Friday, August 1, 2014

"Being a parent changes you. I don't remember the exact moment everything changed; I just know that it did. One minute, I was impenetrable, nothing could touch me. The next, my heart was somehow beating outside my chest, exposed to the elements. Loving you has been the most profound, intense, painful experience of my life. In fact, it's been almost too much to bear. As your (Mother,) I made a silent vow to protect you from the world, never realizing I was the one who would end up hurting you the most. When I flash forward, my heart breaks. Mostly bc I can't imagine you speaking of me with any sort of pride. How could you? Your (mother) is a child in a (wo)man's body. She cares about nothing and everything at the same time. Noble in thought; weak in action. Something has to change. Something has to give. It's getting dark...Too dark too see."